Baby Bear hearts santa!!!!

Just wanted to post a few christmas pics of Baby Bear!!! We have had soo much fun with her this year and she is totally in love with santa -- she adores him and she can say Ho! Ho! Ho! it is sooo funny -

Old Photos

I have been scanning old photos of my family. This is one of my favorites, it is me and my mom about 30 years ago! The older I get the more precious things like this become!

Me and My Girl on Thanksgiving!

Happy Thanksgiving!!!!

Oh we had a great busy day!!!! I will post some pics later!! Did everyone have a great day?
now only 2 more hours to I head out for the midnight sale at the outlet malls!!!!!

love to all!!!!!

Wow

Get a Cash Advance

got this from a blog I read --- was not expecting to be a genius --- is this a joke?

All Smiles!

Haircut

So i got my hair cut off! Just wanted to post a few pics!!! This is the shortest it has been since I was a baby!!!! I think I like it--- we will see! I took the pics myself so ignor the wierd angles!

Goldielocks this is for you!

Can't wait to see you!!!!!!!!!!!!

Tagged -- better get a move on...

so I will still have people to tag -- before everyone gets tagged....... so here goes

I have been tagged by Beth




Rules: Once tagged, you must link to the person who tagged you. Then post the rules before your list, and list 8 random things about yourself. At the end of the post, you must tag and link to 8 other people, visit their sites, and leave a comment letting them know they’ve been tagged.

1. I have 2 brothers and 1 sister -- I am the youngest.

2. I think my dogs and and daughter are the neatest people/animals to be with in the world--they are just awesome!

3. I love wearing house shoes.

4. I love waking up to the smell of food (which never hardly happens)!

5. I am a dog person -- cause um cats kinda scare me --- and I love Big dogs!

6. I really enjoy teasing my husband --- (is that normal?)

7. I think my daughter is very very intelligent --- not just cause she is my child -- I really belive this to be fact!

8. 8 is my favorite number.


o.k. so I am tagging the following bloggers

so I can not link -- I will figure it out later --- I guess I wiil just go to the blogs and tag for now ---- how do you link?

Halloween fun!!!!

We have had so much fun over Halloween we have been to so many things over the past week!!!! I think we are all wore out!!! Just wanted to share a few pics of Baby Bear in her costumes!!!!





This is Baby Bear as a Rock Star!!!!

This is me and Baby Bear as 50's Barbie!




This is Baby Bear as a Fairy!

Our Weekend!

This is Baby Bear before we left going to Elmo!





This is Baby Bear about to give Bert (or is it Ernie) five!


Mama and Baby Bear after the show --Baby Bear was so exhausted - she danced the whole show!

36

That is how old I am today!!!! Great day so far!!! I got a new camera -- just got to do some reading to make sure I can handle all the new technology!

Adoption... Again?

I would really like some feedback on this from anyone that has adopted,placed for adoption, been adopted, considered adoption or just wants to give me your two cents. So me and dh are compteplating adding to our family -- you know having the 4 bears instead of 3 --we ofcourse would love to have a bio child but not sure if that will ever happen, so we are trying to decide on adoption --- if we want to go down that road. I would love any input on if you would adopt again or not -- why or why not, if you would or would not do international --- just looking for some experiences and views from others! Thanks!!!!

LA, LA, LA,LA!!!!!

ELmos World!!!! So the Bear family are going to see Elmo Live in New Orleans this weekend!!! woo-hoo we have front row seats and I am soooooo excited!!!!!!!!! Anyone ever seen the show before --? what are your reviews?

10 Things

About me that are ALL about adoption

1. I would love to adopt from Haiti.

2. I am not sure about domestic infant adoption again --I go back in forth in my mind over this.

3. I do not think everyone that wants to adopt is really cut out for the job.

4. I think adoption is looked at as a good dead WAY TOO much.

5. I love my adopted daughter more than life itself!

6. I miss Goldielocks so much sometimes I just want to get in my car and go see her just to give her a big hug!

7. I wish more people understood open adoption and how important it is.

8. My views on adoption have changed so much over the past 2 years -- to the point of being passionate about certain aspects.

9. After you say the word adopt so many times it starts to sound funny!

10. I can't imagine my life without adoption.

Pumpkin Patch

Well we went to a pumpkin patch today!!! Fun, Fun! Baby Bear thought they were big balls!
She was saying ball and signing ball -- it was funny!!! We had fun, ofcourse there were tantrums invovled I will try to include a picture of one -- but that just seems to be a part of our everyday lives now! She is so independent and really could not understand why she could not pick up the big pumpkins!!!!

10 Things

10 Things About Me That Have Nothing To Do With Adoption:

1. I Love Tootsie Pops!

2. I really enjoy playing tennis.

3. I love my dogs (in an unhealthy way!!!)

4. I have a burning desire to always fight for the underdog.

5. My parents have been married 47 years.

6. I have the same birthday as Hillary Clinton.

7. I can't sleep with the bedroom door shut.

8. I am a night person.

9. Blue is my favorite color.

10. I am scared of cats.

Wordless Wednesday

four things

So I was kinda sorta tagged ( o.k. I had to ask what tagged meant) on this post from a fav blog of mine (http://unproductivereproduction.blogspot.com/2007/10/four-things.html) so here goes my answers and oh by the way if adoption is any part of your life - consider yourself tagged!

Four things I thought about adoption when I was a child:


1. That children that were adopted were mostly from an orphanage.

2. That aparents got to pick the baby they wanted.

3. It was a special/different way to have a child.

4. When a child was adopted, they were either not told or told later in life.



Four things I've learned since then:

1. that there are several different types of adoption.

2. the birth/first mom picks the family for her baby.

3. It is best for the child to always know they were adopted.

4. That open adoption is great!


Four silly things people have said to me about adoption:

1."How long did you have to wait for a white baby?"

2. "since she looks so much like you , you should not tell her she is adopted."

3. "Are you going to have children of your own one day?"

4. "What if her real mom wants her back?"


Four things that are hard about adoption:

1. The pain that your child's first/birthmom has -- the loss and the grief she goes through.

2. Defending my open relationship with my daughters first/birthmom, mainly trying to get everyone to understand the benefits of open adoption --(this has actually gotten much easier)

3. Trying to decide if we want to adopt again.

4. Trying to know all the info I can to make sure my daughter grows up feeling loved and wanted.

Four ways my adopted child/placed child has surprised me (or how your adoptive/first parents have surprised you if you're an adoptee):
1. How perfect she fits my family -- really - just a perfect fit in every way.

2. That she was caucasion, we had originally been approved to only adopt a transracial child - but God had other plans.

3. How I can see so much of my daughters bio family in her and how I can see so much of myself and my husband in her too.

4. How hard it is for me to leave her --- I always thought I would have no problem with this -- but I do not like to be away from her - at all!

Four things I wish everyone knew about adoption:

1.How much the first/birthmom loves her child -- she is doing what she does out of pure love!

2. The stereotypes about first/birthmoms are usually a bunch of hog wash!

3. There is a lot of reform that needs to be done and alot of educating - esp. for the agencies.

4. That adoption is not a charity case to take on because you want to "help" out a needy baby.

And Another thing

I guess I just kinda feel like ranting a little more this week! One of the topics lately that has stuck in my mind is a birth/firstmom that her son's aparents told her or actually the amom told her that she could not bond with her little boy because he looked so much like her!! Oh my Lord! I think this just sunk in with me so much because when I got baby bear's hair cut this week I looked at her and there was godlielocks!!!!! A minnie version of godlielocks sitting there grinning at me and you know what -- it made me happy to know who she looks like! I can not imagine being soooo selfish as to let that prevent me from bonding with my daughter! Not to mention how that made the birth/first mom feel -- have these people been educated in good ole' fashion manners? Not to mention ethics, morals and common sense! This lady needs to get over herself and search deep within to figure out the REAL reason she may not be bonding with her son.
o.k. I'll hush!

Words

I periodically read through the waiting family profiles on the Bethany Website. When i see new couples and read -- it amazes me some of the things they put. Maybe mine was like that too, I do not remember but lordy if we adopt again - it will be different! One I just read said that the reason for adopting was to support a birthmom --- this couple had a bio child and could conceive but felt the need to be there for a needy woman and her baby. Really? I know they have good intentions but if I were going to select a needy cause I am thinking orphans in Haiti or feeding the hungry --- I guess to me domestic infant adoption is just not something I feel is a needy cause --- well maybe it could be - i always felt like the needy one - the weak one that could not have a baby -- I don't know I just can not imagine thinking I did this great thing for Goldielocks by being there to take and parent her baby -- by far us being placed with baby bear has been the wonderful thing -- I guess I just never looked at goldilocks as needing us, yeah God had a plan and it was no accident us finding each other at the perfect time -- no doudt it was meant to be in everyway --- maybe my ramblings are not making sense I guess it just irritates me that adoption agencies are NOT doing a great job of educating these families on the realities of adoption and these couples are walking around with their heads in the clouds actually thinking they are doing some wonderful unselfish act --- and I know being a mom in general is a wonderful unselfish act -- but the act of adoption itself really isn't - I just wish these families had a clearer view of this -- o.k. thats all -- going to bed!

Baby Bear -before and after!!!

Well we finally decided to get the hair out of the eyes!!!!! I really like it -- but I really wish it did not make her look older!!!! but she could not stand anything in her hair -- like cute bows--- so goodbye piggytails -- hello bangs and big beautiful blue eyes!!!







<

Wordless Wednesday

it is Wednesday --Right?

Ins, outs and upside downs of the matter!

Wow! You know lately my mind has been spinning with questions and confusion about adoption. How can something that brought so much joy into my life be the cause of so much pain for others? On a normal day I am just a mom to a beautiful little girl, everywhere I go that is who I am --at walmart, at the playgroup, at church, at chucky cheese , at the zoo -- o.k. everywhere. But then when I visit the blog and forum world -- I am an adoptive mom - and that puts a whole new spin on my role and life. Ideas start to fill up my brain, like am I a good enough mom, do I need to be a better mom than most, who should know my story, when will baby bear become aware that here story is different, will I have the right words to answer her questions, will she hate me for adopting her, will she see it as I took her away, and on and on.... O.K. and then... there is this person that I love dearly, I consider a great friend and sister. She is someone I feel very comfortable with and could share many of my deep thoughts with, a friend I could call and unload my problems on and recieve compassion from! This wonderful person also happens to be the same person that carried and gave birth to my daughter -- yeah that would be dear Goldilocks.
It scares me that one day she will regret her choice and hate me - in my rational mind I don;t think so but in adoptive mom world my brain sometimes gets cloudy. Then I think sometimes oh my situation is different - I am in this wonderful open adoption, where goldilocks is at peace with everything and baby bear is going to be so secure about herself because of that connection and all the love in her life! Am I being simple minded? I don't know -- maybe I read too much, maybe I think about it too much - maybe I will just go to bed and wake up in the morning and just be baby bears mom - maybe that is just all I can do about it right now - maybe just be the best mom I can be and keep on loving Goldilocks and baby bear like the wonderful people they are!
Yeah I think that is what I will do!

Baby Bear is climbing!!!

yep--- another milestone was reached yesterday!!! Baby bear climbed out of her crib!!!
scared me half to death!!! She is fine but in a new set up!!! We got one of those crib tents -- vs. a toddler bed that I know she would not sleep in yet -- because she would figure out real quick that all she has to do is get out and she can play anytime of the day or night!! umm no thanks---- she is way to active and curious for that now -- so the tent will have to do for awhile!!! she is not to sure of it yet and does not understand why in the world she can't toss her binky out ---- anyway my 14 month old is growing up way too fast!!!

Wordless Wednesday

Smiles

So it is funny to me to see my husband smiling in pictures!!! He has never smiled in pictures and this includes our wedding!!! When anyone tells him to smile he usually says in his military voice -"I am smiling" --- well I think the anti-smile problem has been solved and the solution was a daughter --yeap little baby bear! It is just odd to me still to look at pictures and see him smile -- and I do not even really have to ask -- I just say smile and there it is the silly grin appears like magic!

Wordless Wednesday

BabyBear this morning headed to her first morning of Nursery School!

Been awhile!

I love this picture of baby bear!!! Did you know eating a cracker could be so much fun?
I have not posted in awhile, we have been so busy lately!!!! Baby Bear, papa bear and my woderful doggies keep me on my toes!!! I have been quilty of just reading everyones blogs lately and not posting! How is everyone? For those that read the Bethany forums - well there has been a lot of lively debates lately - huh? Oh who protects their blog with a password -- I have been thinking about this lately? what are your opinions?

Two Best Dogs in the World!!

so in my intro I say I have the 2 best dogs in the world but I realized I have not posted pics of those two lovely creatures!!! We went to the vet the other day and she told me they were seniors now!!! they are only 6 - I can't even think about that! --- they are so awesome and just wonderful with my baby bear!!!!!
I just love my dogs!!! sometimes I think I love them sooo much it is not normal! oh well - I can not help it they are just so loyal and sweet!!!!

Me and My Favorite Girl!!!

So what is going on with everyone? My hubby is out of town, so I have just been hanging out alot with baby bear!!!! She is cutting several teeth and has a cold, so she is a little grumpy!

but we have been big buds lately!!!! We are starting a mommy and me fitness class soon!! I am looking forward to that! so what is everyone else been up to?

An Openly Adopted Child's Legacy

not sure who to give credit for this.... I found it online and really like it! I know some do not like the term birthmom, I just left it that way - I think it is more of a known term.





An Openly Adopted Child's Legacy

Once there were two expectant mothers.
One carried and cared for you beneath her beating heart
She became your Birthmother.
The other carried the hope of you within her.
She became your Mom.
As the days passed, and you grew bigger and stronger,
Your Birthmother knew that she could not give you all you needed after your birth.
Meanwhile, your Mom was ready and waiting for you.

One day your Birthmom and your Mom found each other.

They looked into each other’s eyes and saw a friend.
Your Birthmom saw the life your Mom could give you.
Your Mom saw how much your Birthmom loved and cared for you.

They decided that what you needed was both kinds of love in your life.

So now you have two families,
One by birth, the other by adoption.

And you have a home where you can get:
your questions answered,
your boo boos bandaged,
your heartaches soothed,
And much needed hugs.

And a place where you can find:
answers to your questions,
your image in the mirror,
a part of yourself,
And much needed hugs.

Two different kinds of families
Two different kinds of love
Both a part of you.

My mom's cool....

Mom holding baby bear, getting her face painted at her b-day party!




My mom is cool in her own little ways!!! Really she has come around so much about my relationship with Goldilocks. She does not come out and really say much but it is how she acts.
Not once did she mention anything about the kidnapping in Mississippi by the biological mother, ofcourse now we know the facts - but, before we just knew an adopted baby was kidnapped by bmom. Also she will mention in casual conversation that baby bear in her words is the "spitting image of Goldilocks". I think it is cool. So many people find comfort in the fact that Baby bear looks like our family an they tell us all the time -- I guess to "reassure of that she is ours" - God love 'em - they try! And the way my mom loves and adores her with this passionate type love, she says Baby Bear is her whole heart! My mom has 4 children, 5 grandchildren and 2 greatgrands, but she has this special realtionship with babybear, she connects with her so well. I can kinda feel her ease with everything, and it makes me happy!

Admiration

I admire so many things about my daughter, really I do! She is only one but she is just an awesome person! One thing I just adore about her, she has very little fear.
She loves everyone and trusts them as if no one will ever hurt her. She waves to strangers and laughs and wants to share with them. She had half of Wendy's in love with her today when we went for lunch! Her smile lights up any room, and it is if she just sees the good in people - so innocent and yet so secure that she can look at me and then explore her world with no concerns for harm. In one way I know this should scare me, and I guess if I thought about it much it would, but I am always there to protect her and just watch her in amazement! I know one day she will see the world very differently, but as for now she helps me see the world through her eyes and let me tell you it is one amazing place to be!!!!!

Birthday fun!!!!!

Today we had Baby Bear's Birthday Party!!! We had a Luau and it was sooo fun!! She loved it and did so well!!! Just wanted to share a few pics!!!!

vasoline adventure

So have your ever wondered what happens when you get in to vasoline and rub it in your hair? Well baby bear found out and had a lot of fun!!! She is learning how to open everything now and is in to everthing!!! She also nicely distributed 80 baby wipes all over her room today while I was hanging clothes in her closet--- she is one fast baby - well tommorow she will be one so I guess she will be a toddler! Look out world!!!!