My Story....

It occured to me that in starting a blog I need to tell my story. I wanted to be creative and come up with neat little "blog names" for my family. We have always called my daughter her name and added bear to the end, so my wonderful friend and also baby bears bio mom, thought of the 3 bears for us and Goldilocks for herself, so in the future I will be mama bear, the husband will be papa bear, the baby girl will be baby bear, and baby bears bio mom will be Goldilocks--- so that's whose who!!!
I am a mommy, by now I know you get that much of my story, but how I became a mommy is different than most people- or at least most people I know in my day to day life. Anyway papa bear and I could not conceive, not that we did not try everthing from fertility monitors to IUI's to IVF, it still did not happen and then began our journey in to adoption. After a few ups and downs, we were chosen by Goldilocks and meet her and had an immediate connection. This followed by phone calls and e-mails and then baby bears birth. We took baby bear home from the hospital and maintain a very close retaltionship with Goldilocks. I know I just made a comlicated story sound simple, and believe me simple it is not, but it is wonderful! I know , I know there is saddness and loss with adoption and it is very bittersweet, I do struggle with issues and guilt from having my baby girl - gosh ya'll she is just perfect--- but I try to focus on the positive and what I can do to make her life wonderful and healthy in everyway! So I try to stay connected and read blogs and research on adoptees. I stay connected to Goldilocks and she is a big part of our family and for now I think we are all good. I can say my views on adoption have changed and I see so many things that need to be changed, and at the same time as I sit here and watch baby bear on the monitor and she is sleeping so peaceful , like an angel -- I just can't see how I would change a thing in our situation. well today was long - so i better sleep while baby bear sleeps! Good night!