four things

So I was kinda sorta tagged ( o.k. I had to ask what tagged meant) on this post from a fav blog of mine (http://unproductivereproduction.blogspot.com/2007/10/four-things.html) so here goes my answers and oh by the way if adoption is any part of your life - consider yourself tagged!

Four things I thought about adoption when I was a child:


1. That children that were adopted were mostly from an orphanage.

2. That aparents got to pick the baby they wanted.

3. It was a special/different way to have a child.

4. When a child was adopted, they were either not told or told later in life.



Four things I've learned since then:

1. that there are several different types of adoption.

2. the birth/first mom picks the family for her baby.

3. It is best for the child to always know they were adopted.

4. That open adoption is great!


Four silly things people have said to me about adoption:

1."How long did you have to wait for a white baby?"

2. "since she looks so much like you , you should not tell her she is adopted."

3. "Are you going to have children of your own one day?"

4. "What if her real mom wants her back?"


Four things that are hard about adoption:

1. The pain that your child's first/birthmom has -- the loss and the grief she goes through.

2. Defending my open relationship with my daughters first/birthmom, mainly trying to get everyone to understand the benefits of open adoption --(this has actually gotten much easier)

3. Trying to decide if we want to adopt again.

4. Trying to know all the info I can to make sure my daughter grows up feeling loved and wanted.

Four ways my adopted child/placed child has surprised me (or how your adoptive/first parents have surprised you if you're an adoptee):
1. How perfect she fits my family -- really - just a perfect fit in every way.

2. That she was caucasion, we had originally been approved to only adopt a transracial child - but God had other plans.

3. How I can see so much of my daughters bio family in her and how I can see so much of myself and my husband in her too.

4. How hard it is for me to leave her --- I always thought I would have no problem with this -- but I do not like to be away from her - at all!

Four things I wish everyone knew about adoption:

1.How much the first/birthmom loves her child -- she is doing what she does out of pure love!

2. The stereotypes about first/birthmoms are usually a bunch of hog wash!

3. There is a lot of reform that needs to be done and alot of educating - esp. for the agencies.

4. That adoption is not a charity case to take on because you want to "help" out a needy baby.